Memories,Regrets and Prayers
by SmileSusieQ
Summary: The last thoughts of Tudor Characters as they lay on their deathbeds. Edward, Mary, and Henry Tudor are up.
1. Edward Tudor

This fic idea has been bugging me for a while so I decided to go ahead and write.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Tudors. So don't sue.

I'm only a boy yet I have ruled over one of the most powerful kingdoms in the world. I've sentenced people to death including my own uncles and changed the line of succession. Yet for all my power, all my riches, I still lay here dying at only 14 year old. As my hour of judgment approaches my thoughts turn to other things.

Such as my sisters. Sweet and pious Mary, fiery and clever Elizabeth. I have cheated Mary of her inheritance by making Lady Jane Grey the next heiress. What will become of them now? Will they be executed or discreetly done away with? Will Mary take the throne anyway as was our fathers wish after I died?

The lives of the royal children has often been tumultuous as the Kings favor could whip one way or another in an instant. As his only son, I was safe from most of his moods. Elizabeth and Mary however were not. Reminders only of failed marriages, they were often banished and forgotten.

Mary his first child, he had divorced her mother and named her a bastard so he could have a male heir to continue his line. Never again would she know the comfort of being a princess. Where once she was the ideal canidate for the throne, young and beautiful she was now far past what most considered her prime while Elizabeth was just reaching hers. How could she look at her sister and not be reminded of what she had lost?

And Elizabeth who was the spitting image of our father with her dark red hair and light blue eyes. Sometimes I think our father loved her the most out of all of us because she was the most like him and hated her too for the same reason. He had destroyed her mother and her without a second thought. He became a tyrant and when he looked at her he saw himself and all he had done.

I wonder if Mary takes the throne, how Elizabeth will fare under her rule? Will Mary seek to punish her for her mothers wrongdoings?

It is too late for these thoughts now. As my last breath rattles in my chest I pray one last time. I pray that Mary and Elizabeth find happiness as they never did under our fathers reign.

I step into a green meadow no longer sick or tired. There I see Katherine Howard strolling with Thomas Culpepper and a dark haired Spanish looking woman waiting patiently for something. She must be Katherine of Aragon and the other dark haired lady with my father standing beside her must be Anne Boleyn.

I scan the meadow looking for a woman I have longed for all my life. Ah, there she is blonde-haired and smiling. My mother, Jane Seymour. I am finally home.

The End

Tell me if I made a mistake. I plan to have a Mary Tudor one up soon. R&R please.


	2. Mary Tudor

Sorry this took so long. I had horrible writers block and I felt like the last one was horrible. Anyways here it is.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Tudors. But oh how I wish I did.

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I truly loved Elizabeth once. She was just an innocent child even if her mother was the harlot, who could not love her? No one could find it in their hearts to hate Elizabeth for her mothers wrongs. Later this would come to haunt me in the later years. No one could harden their hearts to her if they met her. I should have had children of my own by the time she was born. For while when she was a child and I was a fertile young woman and the desire canidate for the throne as I grew older without husband or children and she grew into a lovely young woman our positions reversed and she was the desired canidate.

I am the Queen Mary Tudor. Never in my life have I doubted it was my destiny. It was what I longed for all my life, along with my fathers love, a husband and children. And yet the throne has brought no happiness. My husband spurns me and I have no children to give my love to. My fathers love was always a battle to be fought for sometimes he couldn't bear the sight of me.

I have fought all my life. I fought to be recognized as Princess of England, fought for my fathers love, for my throne, and for my faith. But victory always comes with a price. I do not understand why my people hate me so much now. They wanted me on the throne five years ago. Now they champion my sister.

What have I done that was so wrong? The heretics had to be weeded out! The true faith needed to be restored! Elizabeth had to be imprisoned and banished because everyday people brought me stories against her. More than enough to sentence her to death! And yet I couldn't sign it. I am not my father so easily able to kill those he once loved.

And everyone who loved my father was the worse for it. My mother, his true wife and queen, was banished to live in poverty. He broke from Rome and declared their marriage invalid marrying that whore, Anne Boleyn. She died alone and in disgrace, with me a bastard. Yet she never stopped fighting for her husband, her throne and for me, her only living child, rightful Princess.

That hateful witch Anne Boleyn! She usurped my mothers place and drove my father to madness. Elizabeth much as I loved her was truly a bastard and had no right to be called princess. Because of Anne Boleyn many good honest people lost their lives. People whose only crime was to follow their conscience. Thankfully her unfaithfulness was uncovered and she was sentenced to death for her crimes and her marriage annulled and Elizabeth illegitimate.

Sweet Jane Seymour. The opposite of Anne Boleyn she was a true wife to my father and a good woman. She wanted me to be restored as princess but died before she could accomplish that. I wonder if my father knew that his long waited heir would die young and I would rule that he might have opted to save her life instead of the childs. Most likely not my father waited too long for a son to give him up.

Anne of Cleves never had a chance as my fathers wife. She was too shy, too modest to ever hold his attention. She was a sweet woman but doomed never to have a husband or children due to the precontract my father claimed was the reason that their marriage was annulled. But she was always kind to me and to Elizabeth.

Katherine Howard the cousin of Anne Boleyn. She was a child not fit to be queen. I couldn't bear the thought that she was sitting on the same throne as my mother. She reminded my father of his youth and that was the only reason he married her I believe. My father sentenced her too to death once he discovered her infidelities. He promised her mercy and gave her none. Her death is what prompted Elizabeth to say she would never marry. And why should she want to with our father as an example?

Catherine Parr was a good woman. She convinced our father to restore both Elizabeth and I to the succession something no other stepmother had ever accomplished. She loved us equally as well while the others favored one of the other. Her only fault was that she was a protestant. But she was a good wife and stepmother. She didn't deserve to die in childbirth while her husband was off trying to seduce a young girl under their guardianship.

Elizabeth as promised to uphold the Catholic faith and I pray that she will keep her promise. She will succeed me as queen and I hope she will return to the true faith. My hour of death draws near and I wonder how I will be remembered. As a bloody queen or as someone who fought her whole life for what was right?

I know Elizabeth will be a good and just queen and I bear her no ill wishes. Indeed I love her as much as when she was an innocent child and merely my sister.

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I am a young woman once again as I step into a beautiful meadow. And there is my mother, the years fallen away from her. And I know that she is waiting for me and me alone. I run into her arms as if I am a child and I know I am home.

End

I always felt kind of sorry for Mary because she didn't really deserve the label Bloody Mary. Anyways tell me if you thought it was horrible or good or if I made a mistake. Thanks for reading.


	3. Henry Tudor

I'm backkkkkkkk. I was going to do an Elizabeth one but then this idea wouldn't leave me alone so I had to write this one first.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Tudors.

The dream sequence is a way different here. I think they let Henry off too easy.

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"How is my son?" Henry turned to see Jane standing there in the doorway. His sweet, lovely Jane. The wife who had given her life in exchange for his son.

"He is well." He replied taking in her appearance. She was dressed in all black with a white veil down her back covering her golden locks. She looked as if she was in mourning.

"Let us see about that." Jane said and then suddenly they were in Edwards room watching the young boy sleep. "You have expected too much of him. He is only a boy. He will die young." she said sounding heartbroken.

"No!" Henry exclaimed. He could not bear the thought of his precious son and heir dying,

"You have killed him." Jane said before she and Edward were gone and Henry was left alone.

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Next Day

Henry looked at his wife Kate and his two daughters. "I have decided to send you away to Greenwich for this Christmas. I fear I will not spend another Christmas with you after that."

"But your majesty why?" Kate asked. He smiled a little at that. She had been a good wife and he was glad that he had not allowed her to be arrested.

"Shhhh Kate. Do not question me." He moved to Mary, his eldest. She looked so much like Katherine it hurt him to see. "Mary be a good mother to your brother and sister." he said brushing away the memory of Janes words.

"Please Father do not leave me an orphan so soon" Mary pleaded. Henry smiled at her as she tried to hold back tears.

"Mary Mary Mary." Henry said. He then turned to his second daughter Elizabeth. Strong, fierce Elizabeth. "Elizabeth you are young but not too young to be a good mother to your brother."

"Yes father. I promise." Elizabeth promised earnestly. He could see himself in her and her mother too. He had no doubt she would survive whatever obstacles life threw at her.

"Bless you child." He said leaning forward to kiss her forehead, trying to put as much love as he could into that kiss. "Now go." He said walking away from his family.

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Returning to his chambers, he found someone he had not expected nor wanted to see. Katherine Howard sat in one of his chairs, looking out the window. Her lovely blonde hair ran down her back in curls. She too had on a black gown. "Why should you be surprised to see me? After all you did kill me." She asked not turning to look at him.

Henry swelled with anger at that. "You betrayed me. You were unfaithful."

Katherine gave a forlorn smile at that. "And what of you and your affairs? Were you faithful to me or any other queen? You sent Katherine of Aragon away to live in poverty because she could not give you a son. You killed my cousin Anne because of the same reason. You threatened Jane because she didn't conceive quickly enough and you divorced Anne of Cleves solely because she did not please you." She stood up and turned to face him.

Henry was surprised at this. She had been but a child when he married her but now she seemed more grown up and mature. He still felt compelled to defend himself against her though. " It is a kings right to take mistresses if he pleases. You and Anne were guilty of treason and adultery. Anne and Katherine were not true wives. They could not be."

Katherine laughed at that. "Death has a way of opening ones eyes Henry. You do what you want without care of others. Anyone who ever loved you was a fool and they paid dearly for it." And then she too was gone leaving Henry to reflect upon her words.

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That Night

"What are you doing here?" Henry exclaimed upon see his first wife. She was dressed in a black mourning gown that had been her style near the end of her marriage and life. She looked as she had when she had first married him, a young bride.

"I have come to see my daughter. Why should that surprise you?" She asked as his room melted away and they were in Mary's as she knelt at her altar and prayed for her fathers soul. "You have not always been kind to her. I have wept so often to see her alone, abandoned by her father."

"Is that why you have come Katherine? To chide me?" Henry said not wishing to listen to another lecture.

"She ought to be a long time married by now with her own children. But you denied her that. And when she sought to take solace in her faith you made that hard for her too." Katherine replied mournfully, her eyes on her daughter.

"Go away shade. Go away Katherine." Henry whispered mournfully. He could not bear to look at her or Mary any longer.

"You sent us away once. Though we loved you. Though I was your wife and she your heir. And still am in Gods eyes. You have made life hard for her and she has not known much happiness and she will know even less in years to come." And then they were gone and Henry was back in his own rooms hoping that God would not torture him with anymore visions.

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Same Night

"Father?" A childs question. A child that had died young. Henry Fitzroy stood in his doorway. He seemed small in comparison with the other visions. He had been so little when he had died with the sweat.

"Little Henry. Why are you here?" Henry turned to look at his son. Dressed in black clothes with a black cap on to cover his blonde hair.

"I came to see you Father. Do you not want to see me?" Fitzroy asked. "Did you not love me as your son?"

"No!" Henry exclaimed. "I loved you as well as any child of mine." It broke his heart to hear his first son again.

"Really? Did your love prevent you from naming Mary a bastard and preventing her from seeing her mother? Did it prevent you from making her a servant to Elizabeth? Did your love for Elizabeth prevent you from murdering her mother and leaving her a motherless bastard whose father would not see her? Did it prevent you from neglecting her? Did you really love us?" Fitzroy sounded closed to tears and uncertain.

"Why do you torture me? Why do you visions plague me in my last days?" Henry asked him turning to look away.

"To remind you. To remind you of the love we had for you and the love you once had for us. So you can remember love as it once was." Fitzroy replied sounding wise for a child of his age. Henry turned again to face his son but he was gone leaving Henry to weep for his children and for those who were gone.

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Next Night

"You were expecting me." A lovely voice, one that tore his heart in two. He couldn't face her yet so he looked at his cup.

"Why should I not? You of all people would not miss this opportunity to hurt me, to torture me." Henry said walking past her.

Anne smiled at that. "You always did have a way of twisting things to suit you Henry. I am here to see my daughter. The only pure thing in my life and in my life I neglected her since she was only a girl and I wanted so much to give you a son." She whispered as the room around them faded away to Elizabeth's.

Henry looked at his youngest daughter reading the treasured book he had given to her. He looked back at Anne in her black gown that made her look beautiful as ever and her raven curls cascading down her back and he did see the same features in her as he did in their daughter.

"But now I am so proud of her. Fiercely proud. She is so clever and beautiful. She will be a fine young woman even though she grew up always uncertain of her position." Anne continued.

"I know. I am proud of her too. And I wish that I could love her more. But from time to time she reminds me of you and what you did to me." Henry said remembering Anne's betrayal. He had raised her so high and she had repaid him with nothing but treachery.

"I did nothing to you. I was innocent. All the accusations against me were false. But you wanted to believe I was guilty. You needed to so you could kill me with a clear conscience and marry your next wife. You have caused many so much pain. You have neglected your daughters and caused them so much hurt. But Elizabeth is strong. Like a phoenix she will rise from the ashes of your destruction and create something anew." She cast one more look at Henry and her daughter and gave them both her beautiful smile.

"Anne please don't-" Henry cried out. But it was too late and she was gone with Elizabeth and he was alone again. He knew he was going to die soon and his son would be king. But what after that? What would happen after that?

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Next Night

The portrait was finished and Henry lay on his bed drawing his last breaths. He saw around him Katherine, Anne and Jane with their children. As he looked upon them all with tears in his eyes, he could not say which of them he loved more.

The End

Well what did you think? Was it good or bad? Did you like the wives changed role? And Henry Fitzroy coming in? R+R please. Thanks for reading.


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